faith, or the lack thereof...

This post is prompted by a blessing. Today is payday and, as usual, the first thing I did today was check the bank account and pay the bills. I almost always hate this task because we inevitably end up with hardly any money left. This has been the case for us our entire marriage. Whether because of poor planning, fewer work hours, unwise spending, or unexpected bills, we've always barely squeaked by. Sometimes we haven't squeaked by and have had to ask for help.
I've always been a stay at home mom. Sometimes I feel guilty, like I'm not contributing to our family's well being enough because I don't bring in any money. So many times I've thought about getting a job. I would think that if I worked, we could afford to save up some money, we could afford nicer things and a vacation once in a while. But every time that I've taken it to the Lord, He reassures me that home is where I'm needed the most and that we will be taken care of. It's so hard to watch my husband work so hard and come home exhausted and in pain every day and to see that his labors only just barely pay the bills. But I know that we're blessed. It's so easy to think of all the things we don't have and forget about the blessings that we do have. We're blessed with a place to live, food to eat, clothing to wear, vehicles to drive, each other, and three beautiful, healthy children.
I was nervous about the bills today because we had to pay our first payment on our recently purchased Jeep. The financing didn't turn out the way we had hoped and our payment ended up being about $100 more per month than we'd planned on. I've been dreading having to pay it. I've done the math over and over and over and it never worked. There was absolutely NO WAY we could afford this and still have money for the basics, like food and diapers. So, I said a prayer before starting the bi-monthly ritual and just went forward. I paid the tithing first, followed by all the other bills and saved the car payment for last. As I did the math, I was shocked to see that, after the car payment, we still would have enough in our account for groceries and gas. Just barely enough, but enough.
I'm humbled by how the Lord watches out for us, even when my faith isn't as strong as it should be.

The Incredible Shrinking Woman

That's me, by the way. Or at least that's what I tell myself. I hear that positive affirmations can make a HUGE difference. Anyway, thought I'd do a weight loss update. You're probably all getting sick of these, so I think I'll just make a little chart to go on the right side column of my blog and log my progress every week. I'm still not going to divulge my exact weight, just loss or gain for the week and total loss since November, which is when I started actively getting rid of the baby weight. I only have 10 more pounds to go until I'm at my 'pre-Jayne' weight. I'm still trying to work out at least 5 days a week, drink tons of water, and do my best to make good food choices. That last one is the toughest for me. I'm such an emotional eater! Just today I was feeling a bit needy and downed a king size Hershey bar and a McDonald's shake. I know... wrong choice. But, I've learned that as long as I'm good most of the time, it's okay to indulge once in a while. So, here are my stats as of today.....
Weight Lost this week= 3lbs! Yahoo!
Total Weight loss= 33lbs

There you have it! From now on I'll just post my stats on my sidebar once a week. Thanks to everyone for your continued support!

SeVeN

Today is our 7th Anniversary! This is going to be kind of a 2 part thing. I'd like to share the story of how Nate and I met, and then share with you some things we've done and learned in our marriage.


Part 1: The Story

Call it Fate, Destiny, or the Hand of God, but I'm a firm believer that Nate and I were directed into each other's lives and meant to be together. It was June of 1998. I was with my youth conference group for church attending the Manti Pageant. We were playing a game called 'sting' with a volleyball on some grass across from the temple grounds, waiting for the pageant to start.
All the girls were talking about him, the boy in the baseball cap sitting alone under a tree. They were all gushing about how 'cute' he was. I wholeheartedly agreed with them, but kept it to myself. Then I did something TOTALLY out of character for me. I went over to him and invited him to play with us. He accepted. All the other girls were flirting shamelessly. I don't flirt(ask Nate) or I can't flirt. That might be a better way to put it. We found out he was from Las Vegas and was traveling with his grandparents. Anyway, he left that night with about 6 of our names and addresses and had given his to us. It was so funny because all my friends said they weren't going to write to him, but I found out later that they ALL did. So, Nate and I exchanged 3 letters. He stopped writing me because his mom found out and nixed it.
Fast forward to the Spring of 2001. I was in my first year of college at Southern Utah University. One day, while writing a few of my missionary friends, I came across Nate's picture with his address on the back. Something told me to write him a letter. I dismissed the feeling, but it just kept pestering me. So I wrote the letter. I didn't hear from him for a few months because he was on his mission in Mexico. We started writing regularly.
He came home from his mission on April 10, 2002. Exactly one week later he showed up at my door. He was actually on his way to see a different girl up in Logan(needless to say, he never made it). He and his friend were stopping in Roy to visit his friend's mom(I was living with my Mom in Farr West). It was snowing really hard(as it sometimes does in April here in Utah) and they were locked out of the house and had no coats. His friend asked if he knew anyone up here and he thought of me. He hadn't been planning to stop and see me, but they were freezing. So, he came over and we ended up spending the entire evening together. We started talking on the phone every night and he came up again two weeks later. That was the weekend that we got engaged. Eight weeks after that, we were married.



Things Nate & Ashley Have Done or Learned during Our 7 Years of Marriage

• We've moved 8 times
• Brought 3 children into the world in 3 different cities with 3 different doctors
• Held 15 different jobs- I've only had 2- The rest were Nate
• Attended 3 different colleges
• Attempted camping 3 times with our longest camping trip totalling 24 hrs. Yeah, we're not avid campers
• Had our own little weekend away at Disneyland, Denver, Pocatello, Evanston, and Salt Lake
• We learned very quickly that 10 weeks is not long enough to know someone before getting married
• We also learned to roll with the punches and appreciate our differences
• We grew up
• We've owned 8 vehicles
• We've watched approximately 2,555 movies together(probably more)
• I don't even want to think about how many diapers we've changed
• Held 12 church callings
• Almost given up
• We've learned the art of forgiveness
• We've supported each other through difficult situations(I won't go into details)
• Overall, we've learned what love and marriage and family are really all about

So...Happy Anniversary to Us! Here's to an Eternity More!

Goblin Valley Part 3: A 3 Mile Hike with 3 Little Kids & The Goblins of the Valley

So...after my wonderful shower fiasco, we were all dressed and ready for our day of adventure! We decided to hike over and see the goblins. At the entrance to the park, they gave us this nifty map with 3 trails on it for viewing the valley. We chose the shortest one(1.5 miles). We packed Jayne into the backpack carrier and put on our sunscreen and hats and headed out. We hadn't gotten far along the trail when I realized that this was not the best idea.

The trail was really narrow and the kids got tired of it easily. We did see lots of little lizards running around, which Jonah loved. It was hard to keep him moving because he kept wanting to stop and look for lizards.

Lilly's sun hat was a bit too small and wouldn't stay on. So my ingenious husband pulled out his pocket knife and cut two little slits in the back of it for her pig tails.
It took us a LONG time to get to the end of the trail. I'm not sure how long because none of us had a watch, but it felt like eternity! The kids were excited to see the 'goblins' even though Kaleb kept telling them that they were live goblins that would eat them. I reassured them that no one was going to get eaten.

When we did get to the end, we were at the observation point of Goblin Valley and we could see that there was a nice paved road going directly from our campground to the place where we were. We totally should have driven! But, hiking is what you do when you're camping, right? Here is a picture of the valley...We walked down into the valley and played on the goblins. The kids loved climbing on all the rocks and finding shapes in them.

Then we took a breather up at the observation point. Here's a shot of Jayne enjoying the view and the wind. Then we geared up to trek another mile and a half back to camp. Lilly was getting really tired by now and I carried her on my back for a while. Then she walked a bit and Daddy put her on his shoulders. So Nate was carrying Jayne and Lilly for the last half of the hike. I was bringing up the rear with Jonah. That kid was exhausted! I could barely get him to put one foot in front of the other. But...we made it!

The first thing we did when we got back to camp was eat lunch. Then the wind really kicked up and we were getting sand in our eyes. So we thought we'd try to get the kids to take a nap. How silly of us. Who could sleep in a hot tent when you can't open the door or window because of the sand blowing everywhere and the tent is making crazy loud noise from the wind that is threatening to blow us all to Kansas?! It didn't take us long to decide it was time to go home. The wind wasn't lightening up and there were more dark clouds headed our way. So we packed up our sandy belongings and hit the road. The drive home was pretty uneventful, we got rained on again and I was just trying hard to stay awake!

So, there you have it. Our camping trip, which totaled 24 hours of actual camping, 8 hours of driving, and at least three days to clean up and recover from it all.

Goblin Valley Part 2: Burning Dinner, Trying to Sleep, & Outwitting the Shower

We arrived in Goblin Valley Saturday afternoon. While Nate and Kaleb set up the tent, Jonah and Lilly wasted no time getting out their camping chairs and building their own 'fire'.

So.... burning dinner. I made my first attempt at foil dinners. Nate built the fire and placed them in the coals. I kept thinking we should check on them, but we got distracted and then it started pouring rain. Our fire stayed lit through the rain, and once it dried out a bit we finally checked the dinners and they were very well done. Luckily we had two more that hadn't been put on the fire yet and they turned out okay. Next time, I'm sticking to hot dogs on a stick. We actually slept pretty good that night, once we got everyone in bed. We put the kids to bed and Nate, Kaleb, and I stayed up and played some poker with starbursts. Nate came out the winner, but was generous enough to share his bounty. We went to bed around 11:30.

Apparently, our sweet Lilly talks in her sleep. She also wiggles out of her covers A LOT! We were up every hour or two tucking her back in. Luckily, it wasn't too cold. Jayne and Jonah slept great, but they both woke us up in the wee hours of the morning. Jayne for a bottle, and Jonah for a trip to the bathroom. Here's Jonah on the trail back to our campsite after his early morning trek to the potty.

This is how early Jayne and Jonah got up.

None of us really went back to sleep after that. We got everyone up and dressed and munched on some cinnamon rolls for breakfast. Once I got the kids dressed and ready to go, I decided that I wanted to rinse off in the shower before getting dressed for our daily activities. So, I gathered my towel and clothes(I forgot the soap) and walked down to the showers. I really wanted some soap, so I stopped in the restroom and filled my hand with the liquid soap they have for washing hands. Then I got in the shower stall and proceeded to, very carefully, undress without losing the precious soap in my hand. I'm happy to report I was successful in that endeavor. In turning on the shower? Not so much. I tried EVERYTHING to get the water to come on! I turned the handle a ZILLION times! I wiggled and jiggled and poked everything I could think of, and no water! Baffled, I decided to try another stall. So I managed to wrap my towel around me, gather my belongings, and move one stall over(all while holding my precious soap). I tried the shower again....no dice. By this time I was getting VERY frustrated. I heard a shower on in the stall next to mine, so I decided to patiently wait for the person to come out and ask them what the secret was. So, there I stood, wrapped in my blue towel outside the showers. When the lady emerged, I asked my question. She informed me that there is a 'sensor' shaped like a circle that you have to touch. It's not a 'button'. It looks like this tiny little decorative thing and I hadn't even thought to try it. She said she had the same problem the first time she used them. Yeah...I was a little embarrassed. Anyway...I finally got the water on, but by this time I had lost my soap. So I just rinsed myself off the best I could and got dressed.

I know...long story. Typing it has exhausted me. So I'll leave you with a picture of Lilly from Sunday morning. She didn't want her picture taken, so Nate snuck under the table to get this shot. Our next installment will be....."A 3 mile Hike with 3 little kids & the Goblins of the Valley"

Our Trip to Goblin Valley Part 1

Let's start with the drive. It's about a 4 hour drive from Magna to Goblin Valley. I figured it wouldn't be bad because we've done much longer drives with the kids before(Las Vegas). Jonah & Lilly wanted to sit in the very back together, Kaleb and Jayne sat in the middle with Nate and I in the front. The kids loved passing by these at the mouth of the canyon. For the life of me, I can't remember what they're actually called. So we'll just call them the "wind propeller energy thingys."

We made a pit stop at the McDonald's in Price. It was great for the kids to run around and get some wiggles out, and of course Jayne had to eat and get a diaper change. Nate's finally getting used to the fact that when you drive with kids, you've got to stop every couple of hours.

If you've paid any attention to Utah weather recently, you know that it's been rainy. We tried to pack carefully and cover everything in plastic bags(we didn't have a tarp--lesson learned), but everything got soaked on the way down anyway.

Overall, the drive was good. The kids were great(can you say portable DVD players?) and it was so helpful to have Kaleb in the back seat with Jayne. Once we got to the campsite, we got the tent set up and laid everything out to dry. Almost everything got dried out and put away before it started raining on us.

The one thing I didn't get a picture of about the drive was Lilly's very first experience with going potty on the side of the road. She picked a very inconvenient time to have to use the bathroom. We were in the middle of the canyon and it was pouring rain. The image of Nate holding her off the side of the jeep with her feet up and her bare bum hanging down will be etched in my mind forever!

Stay tuned for our next installment:

Trying to Sleep and Outwitting the Shower

Adventures in Camping...

We haven't actually gone camping yet, we leave tomorrow. But I'm already tired! Just getting ready to go camping is so much work and I'm not even done yet!

For the record, I am NOT an avid camper. I went quite a bit with my family and church groups as a kid, but since graduating high school I've been camping a whopping 3 times. Nate and I have only gone once, two years ago. It was not fun, for me anyway. I see camping as a lot of work. It doesn't count as a vacation for me because I still have to do dishes, cook, clean up, take care of the kids, sleep on the hard ground, and... it's smelly.

So Nate decided that he's going to convince me that camping is fun. We're headed to Goblin Valley tomorrow with the kids and my brother, Kaleb. I made sure that our campsite has flushing toilets and showers available, which should cut back on the smelly-ness, and I planned our menu to be super simple.

I'll post an update after we get back. Wish me luck!